Your Eyebrows look like Nike Signs”
I know you’ve seen the pictures all over Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. You’ll see a nice looking young lady, posing with one foot in front of the other, with her “pouty lips” poking out and her arm extended with her phone in her hand. Everything is ok, and you’re about to click the “like” button until you notice…her eyebrows. Not only are they completely shaved and drawn back on, they are drawn on CROOKED. Instead of following the natural flow of the eyebrow, they’re drawn on at an angle, giving their face either a surprised or aggressive expression.
Up until the other day, I would clown the HELL out of females like this. I used to say that their eyebrows looked like parentheses, or that they looked suspicious because their eyebrows looked like the bad guys in cartoons. I even terrorized some of my female friends who would draw on their eyebrows by licking my finger and smudging their eyebrows when we were in the club. I know I know, I can be a complete douche at times. But the other day, I had a drunkenly honest conversation with one of my buddies at happy hour that made me look at eyebrow art in a different light (Yes, I said eyebrow art). Allow me to share:
It turns out that some women suffer from Alopecia of the eyebrows. Alopecia is a medical condition where hair is lost from certain parts of the body. Some people have it on their scalp, beards, etc. It’s not contagious, and treatment does not guarantee that the hair will grow back faster or even at all. In cases where the hair will not grow back at all, folks tend to cover it up, sorta like those dudes with patchy beards who put “Bigen” dye in their beards to make it look full.
I mean, if you woke up one morning and your eyebrows were slowly fading away, you would have to do something, right? This is why they draw them on, because a drawn on eyebrow looks much better than no damn eyebrow at all. I never knew that this condition could happen in an area other than the scalp, and I’m glad that after 3 long islands and a kamikaze shot I was able to find out this information. So the next time you see a female with drawn on eyebrows that might not be symmetrical to one another, cut her some slack; she might have a condition that she can’t help. This has been a TC Public Service Announcement; share it with your friends!